Duke Of Web

What do you get when you take 30 years, top-40 gold and every last shred of musical talent away from Canadian rock legend Bryan Adams? You get Aaron Carter! The 1990’s boy wonder and former Disney darling does have one other thing in common with Adams besides flippant Kevin Bacon-inspired hair and rugged good looks; an unfortunate skin condition that left both with pizza face. Fortunately, model-good-looks aren’t required to sell records. Otherwise we’d never have the masterpiece Everything I do, I do For You, which has helped legions of high-school kids cop a feel of ass at senior proms. Adams has a prolific catalog of music that helped define an entire generation. Carter’s only real claim to fame at this point is that his finger smells like Lindsey Lohan. No longer Disney’s bitch, he’s moved on to bigger and better things. Like getting arrested in February for speeding and possessing stank weed while driving through Texas.