Hilarious News Item

Four months after being declared brain dead due to an ATV accident, a 21-year-old Texas man decided to wake up as doctors prepared to harvest his organs for transplant. Somewhere laid up in a hospital is a bitter and disgruntled former heroin addict, pissed off because he's not getting that new liver after all. ....News Archive

Today's Darwin Award

A man charged with stalking Tyra Banks has been ordered to stay away from the talk-show host or face going to jail. Brady Green has been stalking Banks since January. In related news, Tyra Banks was charged with stalking a buffet line. ....News Archive

Duke’s Daily Double

Ashley Dupre and Jennifer Coolidge

When Ashley Dupre’s newfound career as The World’s Most Famous Ho crashes in 3….2…..she can always fall back on her other career: stunt double for Stiffler’s mom.

And now for another shocking revelation:

“New York reports: two separate public identification records reveal that the only Ashley Youmans (the real name of Kristen, a.k.a Ashley Alexandra Dupré) from the Jersey Shore (or anywhere in New Jersey) is actually 32.

So while dumb toolbox Spitzer thought he was paying $4K for 22-year-old tail, he may have in fact been bamboozled by an old, washed up hooker who’s half way to social security.

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