Duke Of Web

After his recent DUI arrest, Bon Jovi guitarist Richie Sambora has more in common with Mickey Rourke than just a pasty, lumpy sourpuss mug riddled with ugly as the result of plastic surgery. Rourke was busted in 2007 in Miami for driving under the influence, while navigating a Vespa. His charges should have included being a grown man riding around on a gay European scooter. At least Sambora was popped in a Hummer.

Sambora continues his spree of bad judgment which kicked off a few years ago when Bon Jovi ripped off their own song. By releasing It’s My Life, they assaulted a whole new generation with what is essentially a rehashed, reworked version of Living On A Prayer, a 20-year-old staple of butt rockery. The rash of stupidity continued with dumping piece of ass Denise Richards, although in fairness she was harboring the evil spawn of bird-faced Charlie Sheen. It now concludes with driving around loaded with his 10-year-old daughter Ava, a move that will surely earn him a well-deserved ass-kicking from Ava’s mother, Heather Locklear. The only way things can get worse for Richie is if he gets caught in a New Jersey public restroom snorting blow off Andy Dick’s crank.